Hosting an exchange student is like opening a window to a whole new world, but here’s the thing: Culture isn’t just what you see on the surface. It’s like an iceberg. The visible part? That’s just the tip! The deeper, hidden part is where the real understanding happens.
If you want to truly connect with your student, you have to dive beneath the surface—into their beliefs (ways of thinking), values (what they consider important), and norms (the unspoken rules they learned growing up in their culture).
Let’s break it down and make those deep conversations easy (and fun)!
What’s Above & Below the Surface?
At the tip of the cultural iceberg, you can observe the obvious things like food, clothing, language, music, holidays. At the bottom of the iceberg, you can discover hidden gems: the beliefs, values, and norms that shape how people think, feel and act.
Here’s a brief guide for taking deep dives with your student, to explore the hidden aspects of culture together. Be prepared to find buried treasures!
Exploring Cultural Beliefs
What Are Cultural Beliefs?
Beliefs are the ideas we grow up thinking are true, whether they actually are or not! They shape how we see school, work, family, and life in general.
Examples of Cultural Beliefs from Around the World
- Japan: Harmony matters more than personal opinions.
- Germany: Rules and structure create success.
- Mexico: Family always comes first—no exceptions.
- India: Respecting elders brings wisdom and good karma.
- Norway: Everyone should be treated equally, no matter their status.
How to Talk About Beliefs with Your Student
- Ask for opinions: “What do you think about this idea?”
- Compare perspectives: “In the U.S., we believe in speaking up in class. How is it in your country?”
- Share your own experience: “We believe teenagers should do chores to learn how to be responsible. What do you think?”
Exploring Cultural Values
What Are Cultural Values?
Values are what a culture sees as important. They shape how people prioritize their time, relationships, and goals.
Examples of Cultural Values from Around the World
- China: The group’s success is more important than individual achievements.
- France: Life should be enjoyed (especially meals)!
- South Korea: Hard work and perseverance lead to success.
- Brazil: Expressive, warm communication shows friendship.
- Canada: Politeness and personal space are highly valued.
How to Talk About Values with Your Student
- Observe and ask: “I noticed you don’t like to talk about your achievements much. Is that a cultural thing?”
- Explore differences: “In the U.S., independence is really important. What about in your country?”
- Explain American values: “Here, being on time is a big deal. What about where you’re from?”
Exploring Cultural Norms
What Are Cultural Norms?
Norms are the unwritten rules people follow without even thinking. That is, until they travel somewhere new!
Examples of Cultural Norms from Around the World
- Italy: Greeting with kisses on both cheeks, even with acquaintances.
- Thailand: Touching someone’s head is considered disrespectful.
- Finland: Silence is totally normal and comfortable in conversations.
- Turkey: Arriving late to social events is not just acceptable, it’s expected.
- United States: Tipping at restaurants is a must, not optional.
How to Talk About Norms with Your Student
- Explain American norms: “In the U.S., making eye contact shows confidence. What about in your culture?”
- Ask about their home country: “What’s considered polite in this situation?”
- Compare experiences: “How do people greet each other in your country?” (Then demonstrate American handshakes, waves, or casual nods!)
Why Does This Matter?
Understanding the hidden parts of culture helps you avoid misunderstandings and build a stronger relationship with your student. Here are just a couple of examples.
- If your student seems quiet, they may not be shy, they might come from a culture where respect means waiting to be spoken to.
- If they hesitate to ask for seconds, they may be following a custom where it’s polite to wait for the host to offer more food.
Be Curious, Not Critical
Cultural differences aren’t right or wrong, they’re just different! Instead of thinking, “That’s weird,” try saying, “That’s interesting! Why is that?”
By exploring the culture iceberg with your student, you’ll not only help them adapt to life in the USA, you’ll learn a lot about your own culture too! So go ahead. Start the conversation. Dive beneath the surface. Start exploring!
And keep an eye out for buried treasures!
